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« February 2015 | Main | May 2015 »

April 2015

04/30/2015

Dallas trip gives American NUFC fans their boycott moment

NUFCinOhioNewcastle United appears set to visit the US this summer for a six-team tournament in Dallas. Now the question for NUFC fans in America, as it has been lately for our Newcastle native counterparts: To go or not to go?

The last time the club came across the Atlantic, in the summer of 2011, any question was unthinkable. Newcastle fans around the continent dropped everything and rushed for the rare chance to see our heroes in person at a normal time rather than on a laptop or distant tavern screen at an hour when sane people are cherishing a weekend chance to sleep in. I put upward of 2,000 clicks on my Ford odometer getting to Kansas City and Columbus for those matches. The experience was worth every tumbleweed-tossed mile. Such instant camaraderie with so many strangers from so far away is something missed in most lifetimes. The walls of the 4th Street Bar near Crew Stadium may still be cracked from the chants.

In the four years since that glorious July, whatever ambition exists at Newcastle United has been revealed as a cynical ruse. Opportunities to contend have been met with retreat and profiteering instead of courage and attack. I may be about to come off as the worst sort of Yankee cliché, but so be it: Mike Ashley's act doesn't play in America. We call our country the Land of Opportunity. It's the core value the nation was founded on. It's one of the few things liberals and conservatives here can agree on these days. Anyone can make it to the top, not to mention someone with every advantage. There's only one thing an American would call a club owner who doesn't think his wits, giant support and the 318th-largest pocketbook on Earth are enough to win with: a coward. It's really hard for Americans to root for a coward. Especially when we're not obligated by birth or circumstance.

This helps illustrate why our blog has been essentially on boycott through much of this season. And why this venture to Dallas presents us with an agonizing decision. Not much would thrill me more than re-connecting with our widely scattered US fraternity and the full-throated, warm-hearted English fans who form the most inspiring band of supporters I've seen in more than half a century of life. But it means 2,000 more miles and untold expense to line a coward's coffers. To send a message that everything we're being subjected to is A-OK. If there's one thing about soccer Ashley likely understands, it's relegation and the resulting lost windfall; I expect the club to make some decent summer signings and run back up the table toward respectability next season. But we all know what comes after that.

It's easy to sit on this side of the pond and tweet at fans in Newcastle to stay home from matches. As a fan in Newcastle pointed out in return not long ago, to actually do it rips the heart out. Now it's our turn to make that call. Not sure what I'll do. Fans on any continent are welcome to comment below with their plans or advice.

Posted by Bob at 07:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (25)

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04/23/2015

REVEALED: Newcastle's Foolproof Plan

Lee Charnley tosses his copy of The Chronicle on his desk. He's not in the mood to read anything more about boycotts or protests.

He opens his top desk drawer and pulls out a thick, glossy sheet of paper. "Newcastle United corporate tactics" it says at the top. He scans the contents:

  • Buy collection of foreign players who will excite Football Manager nerds
  • Perform above average in season's first five months to establish club in upper half of overrated league and pacify fans with false hope
  • Avoid prolonged commitments in cup competitions that overtax undermanned roster
  • Sell any in-demand players in January transfer window to maximize profit and thwart potential Europa League qualification
  • Slide through season's final five months and collect undeserved handout from Premier League

A smile creeps across Charnley's face. He places the paper back in the drawer. He picks up the phone to call his boss. Suddenly he feels like taking Mike Ashley up on that trip the casino after all.*

*The validity of this story cannot be confirmed by the authors of I Wish I Was a Geordie

Posted by Tom at 12:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

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